Material World

Material things are not important in this life. The reason I know this is because in the pre-existence, there are almost no buildings or architecture of any kind. There are only some really nice steps and columns. Also, there are people, singing about whether or not they will find each other or live in the same family on earth. But, other than that, nothing.

The first snowfall of the year...

Always brings two emotions.

1- Excitement. Whenever I see the first snow of the year I could pee my pants (but that's not what inspired this post today).

2- Hatred towards my fellow man. I don't understand what it is about snow that makes people drive like complete.. (I think the politically correct term is) Asians. And yes that is meant to be derrogatory. I'm sorry but if the roads have pretty much been plowed, I'm pretty sure it's ok to go faster than 20, especially when the speed limit is 50. How long have you lived in Utah? I would guess more than a year due to your Utah plates but then again, you know the saying... the problem with speculation is you make a speck out of you and some guy named lation.. or something like that. I have many more things to say about these great drivers but my mother reads this blog. So if you would like to hear more, just give me a call and I will specify how I really feel. Thank you for your time

Yearbook Highlights

7th Grade

-"Wuz up Jordan? -Robbie Q."
- "Gluch, Keep it clean and in the pants. -Ben"
- "Careful with the cold water. You don't want too much shrinkage. -Dan R."
- "Have a fun gay summer with your gay friends. Ha Ha Ha Numbskull"

8th Grade

- "You suck. I probably will not ever see you again -Matt W."
- "Jordan- Have a great summer! Stay away from my house! -Laura"
- "Jordan You're a brat! You're hot though! heart/ Sarah R."
- "Bow down to Satan!!! j/k stay cool -Sean"

9th Grade

- "hey dude! you're way awesome and weird, but that's alright! call me -Kelse M.
- "Jordan Go get them tiger Peace Love Rock N Roll all of the good thing just remember to relax love Dave"
- "let's mate -anonymous"

11th Grade

- "I spend a long time wondering whether you were a jerk or just being funny. I still can't really tell. - Mary"
- "Jordan, Hell ya bitch ass - anonymous"

12th Grade

- " Glue j/k, You're so dang cool!! Have a nice summer! You have cool hair! Mary W."
- "Glutch we should kiss :) -Zack"

Prescription Drug Safety

Well, after many biology and physiology courses, I have come to realize that the human body is amazing. There are so many things our bodies can do, but when they can't, that's where drugs help to fill the void. Drugs can be very useful, although sometimes dangerous, so I've put together a few safety tips to keep in mind before your next visit to the pharmacy.

• Prescription drugs should be kept far out of reach of children, even if they cry, "Please, please, may I have my medicine?"


• Some people say you should not exceed the recommended dosage on the bottle. But, come on, it's medicine–it's good for you.


• If you take medication daily, a useful accessory is a seven-day pill case, which helps you keep track of your intake and serves as a depressing symbol of your mortality.


• Never mix prescription painkillers with alcohol, unless you like to party really, really hard.


• Most people don't realize how much pharmacists enjoy haggling over the price of medications.


• To reduce the risk of mix-ups at the pharmacy, bring a bat with a nail in it.


• Most pills should not be taken on an empty stomach. Sprinkle a handful onto a salad.


• If your pharmacist doesn't offer to have one with you right there in the store, it's probably been stepped on.


• If your doctor refuses to write you a prescription for fear of "lawsuits", and hasn't responded to threats, there's a TON of pharmacies just south of the border. It's cheaper there anyway.

Remember, drug abuse is no laughing matter. Except when it's somebody you don't know.

Women can do anything men can do...

...except math, chess, running,


jumping, lifting stuff, fixing things,

making money, hockey, surfing,


driving, making decisions, being tall,

taking out the garbage, tipping, fishing, being funny (on purpose),

reading a map, listening to good bands, writing, running the country,

inventing anything important,

or being fun to hang out with.




Don't get me wrong, I love women. I just think they should drink from a separate water fountain. Actually, women may be even better than men. But we'll never really know since they are always


swinging at bigger balls, hitting from closer tees, doing pushups from their knees,



taking half the beatles money, hos please.

You know you've been at BYU too long...

...when all you look at anymore is left hands. I look at the left hand even before glancing at the face(which is very unusual for me because I'm very shallow). I guess what I'm getting at is this- This girl(9.5) came and sat next to me in class today and what I considered to be moderate flirting took place. Halfway through the conversation I glanced down and to my sorrow there it was, diamond encrusted lies. So basically my take-home message is this: "Dammit! You got what you came for, you don't need to be in school anymore." BYU would be a lot better off without married females.

Who needs calculus?

Not me.. I'm done..
(P.S- this is the only math you will EVER need to know)